This is the single most disturbing fortune cookie I’ve ever gotten.
LET ME TELL YOU A STORY, CUNTFLAPS! WHEN I WAS A LITTLE KID MY YMCA HAD ONE OF THESE FUCKERS. KIDS LITERALLY HAD TO BE TIMED SO THEY DIDN’T TEAR EACHOTHER’S PRE-PUBESCENT DICKS OFF FIGHTING OVER THIS SHIT. FOR FIVE WHOLE MINUTES YOU WERE QUEEN BITCH AND EVERYONE ELSE WERE PLASTIC CHAIRLESS SCUM MOTHERDICKER, IT GOT SO UGLY THAT SOMEONE GOT BANNED FOR FIGHING OVER IT SO THEY SNUCK IN DURING RECESS AND STABBED IT TO DEATH. THEY MASSACRED AN INFLATABLE SEATING OBJECT BECAUSE THEY COULD NO LONGER SIT IN IT FOR FIVE FUCKING MINUTES. SHITS FUCKED UP I’M FUCKED UP
People are asking me if I was the one who stabbed it to death
Keep your snoopin heads out of shit you can’t handle
(Source: weak-and-brittlebones, via the-lightningwalker)
IM LAUHGING FOR LIKE 5 MINTUTES I LOOKED UP SEXY SNOWMANOH YMGOD FGUCK TBHIS SBHIT DO TOYU SEE ITS MUSCLES LOOK AT THSI PIECE OF S HIT SNOW MAN AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAあああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああああ
homie laughed himself asian
I don’t remember that episode of Spongebob…
Learned something about my calc prof today…
Holy shit it’s a dragon scale.
Black opal. These are beautiful.
no it’s a dragon scale
u probably should’ve said no
(Source: memewhore, via shingekinoswaggie)
if you wear these to school your guaranteed to make lots of new friends